Missing You – July 11, 2020

I think about you several times a day.  You are missed.  When I get up and make my coffee, you are there beside me, waiting for your cup to be ready.  I see your smile and hear your laugh.

One year ago today, I learned from your sister that you were finally awake, off of oxygen, and talking.  She and I had discussed earlier in the week about the e-cards the hospital had on their website to send to patients.  When they got them, they would be printed off and taken to the patient.

I sent two that very night—one from me and one from our writers’ group telling her to get better soon.  I have no idea if you ever did get to see them, especially the one from me with a cute dog on it.

That was on a Tuesday, and your sister said she wasn’t able to see you again until Thursday as her husband would be out of town.  I so wanted to go visit you, but we decided no one would like to be seen that way, so I didn’t push it.

I regret now that we didn’t’ arrange for me to visit you on Wednesday when your sister couldn’t.  I waited for another e-mail from her on Thursday to see if you had seen the e-cards, but no answer.  That day was Thursday, July 11, 2019.

The next morning I found an e-mail your sister had written during the early morning hours.  It said that on Thursday, July 11, 2019, while she was there, you had taken a turn for the worse and left this earth for a better place.

I have so many things in my house that remind me of you as I come upon them.  I have lost many people in my life, but for some reason, this time was different.  I missed our meeting every Tuesday in the food court downtown for lunch before we worked at the library for a couple of hours.

I missed our bus rides all over town just to end up at Westmount Mall to have coffee from the Tim Horton’s there.  For many months after that, I was unable to even take the bus to that area because the ride home would always go by your house.

Today is July 9, 2020, and in a few days, it will mark the first anniversary of your passing.  I find this week you are in my thoughts and I miss you even more than I did then.  I know you are watching down on all of us from wherever you are enjoying your coffee and writing.

There is a bit of good news.  I have what I was able to get of your writing.  Most of it, your sister had thrown out before I got to your house. The group did a tribute to you on our website and posted one of your short stories.  The good news is that story is now a published work.

When I was writing the third book of my trilogy, your story came to mind.  As my characters were getting their lives in order, I thought yours should also be.  After I reached the end of my story, I told my readers a bit about you and then put your story up for them to read.  Yes, I did put the copyright as yours and the year 2019.

Congratulations, my friend, on being able to have one accomplishment done even though you are not here.  We use to discuss what you were writing in the critic group from the London Writer’s Society, and I do have some of those to be another reminder of your words and wit.

I have had many friends, and still do, but you were special.  You were the sister who understood me and helped me to deal with things from my past.  I learned so much from you, but most of all, I learned a lot about you afterward.

I am missing you now as I write this and wish there could be just one more day.  The day you woke up in the hospital might have been that one.  I will remember to wear the shawl you gave me whenever I’m on the bus and get cold.  It stays in the side pocket of my backpack.

When I bake something in the oven, you are there with the oven mitts you gave me, so I would be able to pick up the hot things more easily.  I’m sure you have seen that I finally wrote that book about Buzby after you generously gave me a stuffed one after I admired the one on display at Tim’s.

We are now having a bad time in this world, and with your cancer, you may not have survived this, so I am glad you left when you did.  I do miss you every day, especially on Tuesday’s when my mind goes to making a peanut butter sandwich for lunch and going downtown to meet you.

One day, we will be back together again and maybe can pickup spending some time together.  My thoughts are your thoughts, my friend, and I am missing you so much on this day.